By Frank O’Donnell, WPRO Comedy Contributor
There was one winning ticket sold in this weekend’s Powerball jackpot. $590 million goes to someone in Zephyr Hills, Florida, who now has enough money to immediately purchase Zephyr Hills, Florida.
Providence Mayor Angel Taveras rode his bike to work last week. He says it was his way to participate in Bike-to-Work Day, but really, it was to avoid all the potholes.
While he biked to work, the mayor wore a Johnson & Wales sweatshirt. Not only to support the local university, but also because wearing a Harvard sweatshirt is a good way to start a shouting match on the East Side.
Former state auditor general Ernie Almonte announced that he will not run for governor in 2014 – instead, he’ll run for state treasurer. Not even elected yet, and this guy’s backing off on promises.
There’s a bill being considered by the legislature to raise the minimum wage in Rhode Island to $8. You can hear the “woo hoos!” already, can’t you?
A Chicago man was arrested for trespassing on a private road near Taylor Swift’s new mansion in Westerly last week. Swift already wrote and released a very sad song about it – it debuts on the country stations this week.
Former Brown University president Ruth Simmons was handed the French Legion of Honor award last week. She was immediately whisked off to Algeria where she’s drinking bad wine with a bunch of Legionnaires.
There were reports last week that Robert Kraft, owner of the New England Patriots, is thinking about buying The Boston Globe. I’m looking forward to that 24/7/365 coverage of Tom Brady and the boys. How about you?
Residents of Prudence Island are looking for someone new to run the ferry service between there and the mainland. Captain Joseph Hazelwood and that guy who ran the Costa Concordia aground need not apply.
State health director Michael Fine is urging Rhode Islander’s born between 1945 and 1965 to get tested for Hepatitis C, because we’re five times more likely to contract the disease. Like turning 50 wasn’t stress enough.
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Frank O’Donnell



